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Showing posts with label march. Show all posts
Showing posts with label march. Show all posts

Friday, 27 March 2015

9 THINGS NIGERIANS WANT FROM THEIR NEW PRESIDENT - by Oluwadamilola Adio

Guest post
WHAT NIGERIANS WANT FROM THEIR NEW PRESIDENT

With the 2015 general elections getting closer than ever, this article wants to highlight some important issues the incoming President should address with great commitments and seriousness. It is no longer news that we have two big contenders amongst others jostling for the occupancy of the Aso Rock Villa and the leadership of this huge nation; the incumbent President Goodluck Ebele Jonathan (GCFR) of the People Democratic Party which has been ruling for all the 16 years of Nigeria's young democracy and his biggest opposition is in person of General Muhammadu Buhari a former military head of state and 5 time aspirant contesting under the new opposition party; All Progressive Congress.

After their emergence as the flag bearers if their respective parties for the Presidential race, it is to be noted that the electioneering and campaigning strategies of the two biggest candidates has not been of the highest standard with both parties often coming short of issues to be addressed after being elected, instead their campaigns has been filled with baseless accusations and counter accusations, incessant finger pointing of wrong doing by one the other, varying degrees of lawsuits, numerous controversies and buying of the electorates with money, not forgetting their colourful rallies and advertisement.

Wednesday, 25 March 2015

How Far would you go to defend your beliefs?

The Bus Ride
The consciousness had never been this high.
People who used to feel detached and unconcerned, now debate in Cafeterias and on bustling streets. Newspaper vendors, never witnessed so much sales and attention, these days, their headlines were flooded with Libels and written slander. Headlines are up for sale to the highest bidder and the mass media are divided along political battle lines.
The circumstances surrounding these forth coming elections are absolutely unpredictable. While some sing of change and the enthronement of a new dispensation, others prefer to water the dying tree of continuity, hoping that another four years would see it finally bearing the much awaited fruits of development and national security. Yet, some others disagree with both aforementioned groups. A third party clamours for a total breakaway from the present and the past. They neither want a four year extension of the present nor a repeat of the past. This third group clamours for the majority of the numerous minority parties, who unfortunately garners the fewer percentage of the electorate.
Somewhere on the corner of a sleeping Lagos street, a grey-hair recounts events of years past. Times when one naira equalled one dollar on the foreign exchange market. His army of young listeners stood attentively,  forming a semi-circle around him, captivated by the educative voice of over eight decades old. The grey hair, sadly recounts years of when his country stood tall and proud among the comity of Nations. He speaks of those years with grave sadness, he remembers them as a mother would, a foetus that was dead at birth.
I board a bus-load of students and youths, all of whom had just left the venue of a town Hall meeting, where smear politics had just been executed by yet another political party. The Bus is filled with silence, but was also as tense as a house filled with petrol, waiting for just a spark to ignite it's ability to explode.

7 Laws of Drinking Alcohol

Every passing day, more youths join the army of adult Alcoholics. The question is no more, how to stop people from consuming alcohol. The only realistic thing to do now, is to manage these alcoholics to ensure they drink responsibly, without causing injuries to either themselves or others in the society.
Here are 7 steps to achieve this.
1. Never drink before or while driving
Everyone knows the reason for this, please even if you feel like committing suicide, just do it quietly in the comfort of your own house. You don't have to take others with you.
2. Know your Limit
You love alcohol, cool. Now, its time for you to gauge yourself and realise your tolerance level and limit.
3. Never Drink beyond your limit
Once you get to your limit, then its time to stop. Unless you wish to pass out for hours, wake up with a gargantuan hangover or walk right in front of a speeding vehicle. If you do not wish for any of the three scenarios above, then stay on your own alcohol lane. Do not play the hero with Alcohol.

Friday, 20 March 2015

MAJIYAGBE OYINDAMOLA

This is a special feature, based on a request from a very close pal. It seems that these days, people come to me for an in depth analysis of a Babe or Dude they are curious about. See my life sha, i don turn free private investigator.
Although she was not my coursemate, both of us were from the same faculty, therefore it was a matter of time before we ran into each other.
I began to notice Oyinda in our second year in the University. Throughout my first year, i was academically lax and showed to serious inclination for either intensive academic rigours or good scores. However after a very dismal performance in academics that year, my second year, saw a change in my attitude towards my academics. It was during this transition period that i passively noticed Oyinda for the first time.

ADELEKE BABARINDE AMOS - class series

For some strange reason, Amos prefers being called Amosquito. The first time i came across this name was somewhere on my Bbm contact list, i can still vividly remember the way i was fascinatingly   ruminating over the strangeness of such a name. However, with time, i learnt to accept its existence with open arms.
By our second year in school, someone had already been shown the exit door due to his outrageously poor grades. This left our class of thirty-three being reduced by one. Then as if by an act of God, Amosquito came along, a veteran Diploma student, who had scaled through the luxury of Diploma and was now faced with the harsh realities of being a full time student. Amos joined our ranks in year two and the equation was balanced once again.

Wednesday, 18 March 2015

A Poem about the The British Military Expedition on Benin in 1898

In early 1898, the British army marched on the ancient African city of Benin. This was a reprisal attack, following the Benin Massacre of a British convoy in 1897. The convoy, led by British Consul Phillips was headed for Benin, in spite of having been told they were not welcome.

The British army consequently sacked the ancient city, hanging chiefs, burning houses and stealing hundreds of exquisite Benin  artifacts in the process.

The British Massacre of Benin

I am the Oba of Benin,
Ovonramwem the great!
They painted my kingdom with fire,
Then birthed my artifacts in their museums.

A letter i would never read,
Was addressed to the Queen.
Blood flowed like a racing river,
They called ague a festival of barbarians.
Then birthed our artifacts in their museums.

My Chiefs hung suspended between the sky and the earth.
Their fires voraciously fed on my habitat,
Infants and women fell as the tiny pyramid leads ate into their flesh.
They birthed our artifacts in their museums.

They waved their bloody fists in the air,
A successful massacre by their civilised standards.
They had no honour, pity or love,
Bibles were sewn in our farms,
We reaped schools and colonisation.

"They have no technology nor civilisation",
He stopped himself in mid-track.
The pieces of art in his palms said otherwise.
They shunned the voice of truth,
And sang home a victory song.

We had no civilisation?
Yet you beheld our arts
And stood spellbound.
You smuggled them to England,
To sit among the best of yours.

We had no civilisation,
Yet the Queen refuses to return
Our ugly sculptures and carvings.
The Benin artifacts,
Lives in British museums
To prove how blatant a lie can be.

Monday, 16 March 2015

10 shortcuts for jumping a bank queue

Bank Queue's are very irritating and time consuming. Sometimes, one could spend as much as an hour, gradually shuffling through a slow moving queue at the Bank.
These tips therefore have been drafted, not to cause chaos or disorder in our Banks or anywhere else, but rather in recognition of the fact that some people are busier and in haste than the others.
These 10 shortcuts are not meant for everyone, they are meant for only those who can't wait! So I ask you the question, "Can you wait?"

10 SHORTCUTS FOR JUMPING A BANK QUEUE

1.     First of all, secure a space on the Queue

As a matter of principle, immediately you walk into a bank and realise there's a queue, the first thing you do is to always secure a space behind the last person on the queue. Then you can proceed to filling out the tellers, form or make any other enquiry you need to make.
NB: you can secure spaces on different queues for different purposes, in case you did not come for a single transaction.

2.     Ask the receptionists for the availability of the service you want.

In this case, after securing a space on the 'customer service' queue, the next thing you should do is to walk to the receptionists and make sure that the service(s) you need is/are actually available. This is to ensure that you do not spend minutes on a long queue, just to realise that 'they have network issues on the ATM platform'.

3.     Be observant!

One sunny afternoon, I walked hastily into a Bank. I was supposed to have paid for something, hours ago, but was delayed till later. The bank was filled with a long queue, yet i noticed that immediately someone stood up in front of one of the receptionists, no one made a move to replace him, so i fluidly moved to the seat and was accorded the desired attention.
Truth is that some people come to the bank to feel comfortable, they want to enjoy the A.C, sit on the cozy chairs, drink water from the dispenser, these type of people do not want to leave! So you have to be observant, else they would just waste your time.

4.     Make Polite requests

Some people love to act all nice and friendly in public, hopefully, you would always meet such a set of people on the queue. With a polite request and the right amount of "I’m in a hurry" body language, some people would allow you to make the transaction before they do.
This tactic works better when you are already walking towards the bank attendant, then those on the queue would complain, you respond with a polite apology, then they would waive you off as 'rude', but then, you don't care, do you?

5.     Walk Right behind the next person in line, and insist you have been there previously/all along.

This trick requires a lot of confidence and gut, so if you have neither of these, please try the other tricks.
This is how it works, just walk behind the next person in line to be attended to, when everyone else complain, look them in the eye and say the words "I was on the queue" or whatever else you deem fit. Just don't leave the line, no matter what. If you do so, the ensuing disgrace would be too much to bear.

6.     Find someone you know on the queue

Once you find a friend on the queue, just walk beside them, and then start a hearty, lousy conversation. Make sure you keep the conversation going until it gets to their turn, then either of you may go first.

7.     Be friendly with and always tip the bank staff;
always be friendly with and tip the, security personnel, receptionists and cashiers significantly whenever you visit the bank. With time, this would help you get preferential treatment and avoid queuing up at all.

The Rainstorm - A Short Story

It was mid June, back then when the seasons respected their timetables, the weather was predictable and a fog of dark cloud always gathered to usher in an downpour of rain.
Today, the morning had predictably given way for the afternoon to emerge, the noon too did not deny the evening and its dusky outlook a chance to exist.

The cool evening breeze, caressed our tender skins. The tall trees and thick shrubs danced as one to the soft melodies of the east wind. Gradually, the sky began to dim its smile, darkness approached confidently.
If Grandma was here, she would allude the sudden change in weather to the death of a Lion in the wild. Sometimes she even contradicted herself and blamed it on the death of a powerful chief somewhere yet unknown to us. Once in a while, her later prediction usually coincided with the death of someone prominent. In our infant minds, Grandma was a wise sage, possessing the monopoly of knowledge. This evening, Grandma was not here, she was miles away at our village somewhere in Ibeku.

Early this morning, even before the first crow of the cock, Mother had left for the garden egg market in the heart of Owerri, the State capital. She had left me with clear instructions regarding the feeding and conduct of my siblings and I, while she was away.

I was the eldest Child and in the absence of a Dad who worked in far away Lagos, i became her trusted lieutenant. At the age of ten, i was already a good cook, an expert at bathing my Baby sisters, and the foremost caretaker of our ill-furnished one room apartment.
My Sisters I, sandwiched in an isolated house shamelessly sitting in the middle of a semi-forest had weathered many rain storms together. Although the angry bangs of some thunder strikes sent us into scamper, we had learnt to predict the magnitude of a thunder strike by the length and brightness of the preceding lightning.

Over the years, we had also learnt to expect the mopping which succeeded every rainfall, since the whole floor of our one-room habitation was sure to be drenched in water.
The rains had begun by five that evening, it started on a slow fashion, then gradually grew in momentum and intensity. The Thunder strikes tonight betrayed the warnings of the lightning. No matter how bright and long the lightning flashes were, the thunder strikes seemed to outdo them threefold. The rain kept pelting the zinc roof of the house, deafening us with loud spattering noise, like the beating of a thousand cymbals at the same time . I looked out of the low window, and the flood outside was already rising to a terrifying height, it sped with so much intensity that i doubted if the house would still be standing when this rain's onslaught was over.

What made me really scared however was the thought of the Biblical Noah. We attended the little Church two miles away, the pastor was a very sad man, who derived so much pleasure in terrifying his membership of eight adults and five children with the horrifying stories from the Bible. Whenever he was not talking of the horrendous death experienced by the inhabitants of Sodom and Gormorah at the hands of a fiery conflagration, he would be threatening us with drowning like the world during the time of Noah. It seemed that the only way for us to escape such painful deaths were to pay more into the church coffers, the only problem however was that if we had as little as enough bus fare, we would have preferred to attend the big Cathedral at the City and not this shack for a Church.

So tonight, in my Childish mind, i considered the Pastor's prediction and the possibility of its actualisation. Maybe God was tired of our widow's mite and had come for a revenge mission. I peeped through the window again and this time, was blinded by the powerful flash of a lightning, i cringed, expecting the explosion of a mighty thunder, none followed. At this point, I was convinced that God was surely annoyed at us, the lightning was just him taking a last photograph of me, before increasing the knob controlling the rainfall. The flood outside kept rising.
Both my sisters were huddled up together beneath the bed, i could hear them whimpering and calling out for their Mum; a mum who was stuck in a market somewhere. One a normal day, she never made it home before Ten at night, with the weather condition this night, i did not even bother to imagine what time she would come back home.
Sullen, I knelt beside the bed and started confessing my Childish sins. The other day, i had taken Chidi's pencil without his consent, Chinedu had said my Mum was Mad and i immediately wished his mum same. Today in school, i had admired the small outgrowth of Maria's breasts beneath her blouse, i was not sure if this too was a sin, but i confessed it anyways, i confessed everything that crossed my mind that night.

I turned around when someone insistently tugged at my Shirt. It was Mum, her calm face radiated care and concern. I could see the first sign of daylight seep through the sleeping window. Mum searched my eyes and let a tear escape her sad face. She reached for me and we held in tight embrace. "D'im" she whispered in Ibo, she always called me that in appreciation, whenever i had done something a Child of my age would never have the courage to face. "D'im, Ogadinma" she whispered into my ears once more. "My Husband, things will get better", i held unto her as i would dear life.

Written By Onyeoziri Favour
Email: favouronyeoziri@gmail.com

Sunday, 15 March 2015

How Safe Are Our Mothers?

The word bastard may be used to connote the absence of any known biological father in a Child's life, however i am yet to hear the female version of the word. Suffice to say, there is no word in the English dictionary which denotes the absence of a Mother in a child's life. This goes a long way to emphasis the invaluable role mothers play in the life and survival of Children and by extension the human race. A father is dispensable, but a mother is almost impossible to dispose of.

Saturday, 14 March 2015

OBI KENNEDY - Class Series

Before him, i had never seen anyone talk so highly of drumming. By his standards, Ken was the best drummer in Lagos. He never stopped bragging about how he is a self-trained drummer, whose skills were natural and not just acquired by attending some school somewhere.
Handsome, verbally eloquent with a good mastery of the grammatical rules of the English language, Kennedy was not just a man of the people, he was also a man for the Ladies.
Throughout the four year duration of our course of study, Kennedy had the same hairstyle - a faded Mohawk, and i have always wondered if this hairstyle had anything to do with the way he thinks and speaks.
You are already wondering, how does he think and speak right? 

Friday, 13 March 2015

7 Internet security Secrets everyone should know

Our world has evolved beyond the use of crude implements and analogue machines to the age of computers and digital devices.
Almost all aspects of our everyday lives are increasingly being affected by computer systems, whether in form of a mobile device, a CCTV Camera or even a conventional desktop computer system or personal computers.
However, every positive thing usually comes with a negative downside. Today, one of the shortfalls of Computer systems is insecurity, which may lead to breach of personal space, information and data by others. This is usually possible when individuals are very lax and carefree while transversing the web or internet.
Many people have fallen victim of internet security breach and have lost Millions of dollars in the process, others have had private pictures exposed online, while some others have fallen prey of leaked conversations. The list of the negative impacts of a breach in internet security is endless.
I therefore bring you this 7 easy but highly effective tips to stay safe on the internet.
7 INTERNET SECURITY TIPS EVERYONE SHOULD KNOW

Wednesday, 11 March 2015

This poem is dedicated to the Sun on a snowy Day

Coloured Rays

It wakes up behind the clouds,
takes its bathe in the misty fog.
A crown of radiance adorns
its crystal face.

Look down upon us,
With your eyes of lightning,
let a breaking ray be your Smile,
We wish to embrace the warmth
Of your presence.

Come, break the thicket of snow,
Which has usurped our streets.
We wish no longer for
The mound of glassy sea
Which capsulates our cars.

I want to play on the curb,
Kevin happily announces to Mum,
He pretends unawares of
the chilly fingers of the cold.
She replies him,
Pray to Ra the sun god.

Tuesday, 10 March 2015

A Morning Lasts Forever - A Poem

A Morning Lasts Forever

Silence surrounded the atmosphere,
A beautiful formless quietness,
Sparse showers of dew,
Clouded the breaking dawn,
Delaying the sun for a few more hours.

In the distance,
a dog walks its blind owner.
The park's flowers relish the
Wetness of their leaves.
A beautiful melody escapes the
Wind's chilly lips.

In all of its whiteness and beauty,
The shekeleke Bird perches on the
Fence, the flowers and the wet ground.
The snakes lay hidden in the warmth
Of their holes.
The chameleon turns the weather's colour.

My bed envelopes me in its warmth.
I take off a minute to kneel and look
Through the window to see the first
Ray of the fiery sun,
Breaking through our thin frost.
Nothing good lasts forever,
nay, nothing at all does.

Written by Onyeoziri Favour
Favouronyeoziri@gmail.com

Monday, 9 March 2015

Have you ever wished for those good old days when honesty paid and hard work brought wealth and riches? Yes! I Wish

Away With Virtues and Vice

Flabbergasted, i have seen you carry on,
with patience and poverty hounding your
every step.
You speak of wants and lack,
as kings do Gold and Silver.

Impressed, You hold your head above water,
You drown without a scream for savage,
those echoes you make
exists but in you head.

You talk of dignity and honour,
Like a plaque it adorns your
Hungry face,
The contrast, even a clown would humour.

Days when honour
was worth more than a gold coin.
Years when a hard day's labour fed families.
Times when Honesty wasn't a dying word.
I wish those days back,
not for my crooked self,
But for you, the starving Saint.

Written by Onyeoziri Favour
Favouronyeoziri@gmail.com

Saturday, 7 March 2015

Pregnancy Test - A story about 21st century teenage girls

Every evening, at about seven , the Family of four gathered in the modestly furnished sitting room to watch Africa Majic on Mnet. This was understandably so, since both parents had to leave for work as early as six every morning, while their two daughters, both still in senior secondary school, also had to leave for school some thirty minutes later when the school bus pulls up into the neighbourhood by six-thirty.
The evenings were the only time when the small family had to spend together. Although both daughters, resented the idea of spending their spare time watching boring indigenous movies with their 'outdated' parents, however making an appearance by seven every evening was not negotiable. It was a family rule, enacted by Mum and ratified by Dad, so, no one dared go contrary to this. 

Thursday, 5 March 2015

This Poem is about a youth who sadly anticipates the worries of adulthood.

These days, i find myself writing more and more about my youthfulness and the dirge that would soon become of it.

As  someone who is still within the comfortable boundaries of his twenties, i look forward to another twenty years from now, and all i see is a stranger in the mirror, one or two deep creases on the forehead, three Children screaming 'Daddy', A wife who is constantly threatening to sue for a divorce and a fair sprinkle of grey hair.

Ageing scares me, and so i have learnt to talk about it everyday, until the day i would wake up and realise that finally, i had aged.

My Ageing Youth.

Day has hid its bright face,
Dusk invades the atmosphere,
It rides on the back of darkness,
The good days have bowed out.
A scene winds down.

Sorely, i miss the variant voices,
The arguments and agreements,
In the thick of dusk,
When the blackness had veiled the pole. Time stole upon us unawares
And usurped our youth and exuberance.

I long for the days past,
When our scuffles terminated in laughter.
Times when our shouts violated the night,
When our jokes defied the sacred midnight,
Beautiful memories of jests and jokes and.

We all blossomed into independence,
Responsibilities began to weigh in,
Sons must father sons,
Youth must prepare for days of grey hair.
Alas! The echoes of our laughter
Are carried away by the cares of adulthood.

The deadly shortcut - The Touching Tale of a Single Mother & her Three Children

Although it was very true, She never bragged to anyone about her husband being a Policeman. Maybe in some climes it could earn a wife respect, or help protect the children from bad men, however over here in this semi-thicket of a residential area, no one really cared. In fact a silly divultion of such an information, would lead to instant hatred by the horde of small hard core gangs, who occupied the forested scenery and numerous abandoned buildings in the area.
The small Family of Five had been ejected by a previous Landlord, a man who had been serially accused of being a member of a cult and also a ritualist. Anyone who questioned the rationale behind such grievous rumours against the Landlord would be told that, that was the only feasible reason to explain his disinterest in completing the construction of the House. It was a widely held belief that the members of some certain secret cults like the Ogboni, as part of their initiation rites were required never to fully complete the construction of any of their buildings. At least one or two things should be left out while erecting a building, no matter the size of such an edifice.

Tuesday, 3 March 2015

The Best of Poetry

A Morning Lasts Forever

Silence surrounded the atmosphere,
A beautiful formless quietness,
Sparse showers of dew,
Clouded the breaking dawn,
Delaying the sun for a few more hours.

In the distance,
a dog walks its blind owner.
The park's flowers relish the
Wetness of their leaves.
A beautiful melody escapes the
Wind's chilly lips.

In all of its whiteness and beauty,
The shekeleke Bird perches on the
Fence, the flowers and the wet ground.
The snakes lay hidden in the warmth
Of their holes.
The chameleon turns the weather's colour.

My bed envelopes me in its warmth.
I take off a minute to kneel and look
Through the window to see the first
Ray of the fiery sun,
Breaking through our thin frost.
Nothing good lasts forever,
nay, nothing at all does.

Written by Onyeoziri Favour

Monday, 2 March 2015

This Day, I swear! - A Short Story

The month officially ends today. Many of my friends on campus had already left for home yesterday, even those who normally would resent the idea of going home for weekend had enough sense to go home on these particular weekends. It was not rocket science at all, on the contrary, it was simple common sense, this was the last weekend in this month which of course is the same with every other weekend except for the fact that this weekend usually witnessed the disbursement of funds into most student's accounts.
While some Parents are salary earners who usually looked forward for the end of every month, others are business people who woke up to every other day as a payday. For most students however, this has little or no meaning, whether their parents were salary earners or otherwise, most parents usually made the allowance thing a monthly affair.
Only a few parents would send their Children significant amounts of Money every other day or weeks. They would rather make the transaction an agreed lump sum which would usually be sent at the beginning of every month. Students however have little patience and therefore do not even wait until such monies are sent, they would rather go home by month end to claim what is rightfully there's.

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