Warning! People are turning into Robots

Mass culture and cliché

Everyone goes to school, everyone wants to sing and make big bucks like wiz kid and Davido, every boy out there wants to play their way through the streets of Berger to the top flight football clubs in Europe, everyman believes most women are in relationships for money, every woman believes that any man who as much as accidentally looks their direction on the street wants to take them to bed, every politician is corrupt, Christians must attend church on Sunday, you cannot succeed in an examination without cheating, men have to ask women out on dates all the time, Women have to stay at home and take care of the children. Please give me a break, I am tired of the Cliches!

If we accept that the Merriam-Webster dictionary is any authority at all on the English language, then we may approve of its definition of Cliché to mean; "Something, most often a phrase or expression, that is overused or used outside its original context, so that its original impact and meaning are lost. A trite saying; a platitude. [from 19th c.]"

Bolakale Michael - Biography

"please where is Professor Michael?" was the question a beautiful female second year undergraduate once asked me. That fateful day, i had visited the office of the legislative arm of the faculty student body. A few minutes before 'Miss beautiful damsel' appeared, i had been with Mike, who happened to also be the clerk of the parliament. So when this young lady popped this rather familiar question, everything seemed in place, except for the title 'professor'. It took me about a minute of prodding to actually believe that it was indeed my friend, Mike, the clerk that was being referred to by the highest academic title 'professor'. Although i smiled and replied her that "Professor Michael just stepped out", immediately she left, i felt a pang of jealousy and regret, i began to question the wisdom in my refusal to organize extra tutorials for students in the lower levels, in-spite of my good academic scores. Just imagine, here was my friend and contemporary, Mike, being addressed in such lofty terms.

UNILAG: On a Lighter note, there are 9 Types of Exam Invigilators in Unilag

Recounting my ordeals at the University of Lagos with the types of Invigilators I encountered in the Exam Halls...

1. The ones who will praise the first student to submit his booklet making every other students look like they know nothing. “Woooooow !!!Do you mean you have finished?”
They will face other students and say “can you see your life?, he finished within an hour, that is a well prepared student”.

2. The ones who will keep telling you the history of their lives, how they performed excellently amongst their peers when they were in University.
* if I hear*

3. The ones forming James Bond in the hall.
They will start giving testimonies of how many students they have caught cheating and have been rusticated **wetin concern us with that one ?**

4. The ones who will collect your question paper, go through the questions and shake their heads pitifully without saying anything.

5. The ones who will glance at your answer booklet and they will ask why your booklet is blank. “Didn’t you read for this exam ?”
**Abeg swerve go left jor**

6. The ones who will never accept your apology if you are caught cheating. The moment you are caught cheating, just start thinking of what else to do with your leave of absence

7. The ones who are very sensitive: Try communicate with any student and they will change your seat, you keep wondering how smart they really are to have noticed you.

8. The ones who are very gentle and friendly. At the start of the exam, they will plead with you not to disturb but gives you access to teach yourselves and even watches other invigilators for you.

These ones are students favourite*Me like too*

9. The ones who will force you to submit even if you still have an hour left. They will tell you “what are you still writing when all your mates have submitted?”

Which of them annoy you the most?

By Dapo Babalola

IMPORTANT FACTS our President elect should not forget - by Gbadamosi Bidemi

Muhammadu Buhari

It is no longer news that fate has decided to smile on erstwhile military dictator, Muhammadu Buhari on his fourth successive quest for political supremacy. Even Darasimi, a boisterous 3-year old in my vicinity keeps chanting "Sai Buhari" intermittently as the Daura born austere president - elect is set to assume the mantle of leadership come May 29.  The unprecedented outcome of the presidential polls is borne out of the fact that this is the very first time a dogged

opposition (the All Progressive Congress) will wrestle power away from the incumbent party. This further attest to the fact that the electorate should not be marginalised as they dictate the tune with their statutory franchise.

Xenophobia: an ugly phenomena with a fine name - Gbadamosi Bidemi

Guest Post

In the wake of the dastardly assaults on immigrants in Durban, South Africa, 
initial reports had it that incendiary utterances credited to Zulu king Goodwill Zwelithini fanned the embers of hate and animosity, subsequently triggering off the Xenophobic(or afrophobic) havoc wrecked on foreign nationals. The traumatized comprises of Nigerians, Somalis, Kenyans, Zambians, Mozambicans amongst others. 
However, the Monarch has come out to refute the purported pronouncements. He emphasized that he was misquoted by journalists and other media personnel hence holding them culpable. He further affirmed that if he had actually uttered such inflammatory remarks about foreign nationals taking most of the jobs available - to the indigenes' detriment, the entire place would have been reduced to ashes as of now. It can be recounted that in 2008, a similar mayhem on similar grounds occurred in the South African country, claiming scores of lives in Johannesburg's townships. The recent spate of brutality has claimed at least seven lives, seen shops, factories, workshops and establishments looted, torched and vandalised with no remorse whatsoever. All these property were owned by the victimised foreigners. 

Virginity and Marriage

Virginity and Marriage

Generally used to depict a state of purity and stainlessness, the word 'virginity' however becomes more important once it is used to refer to the state of human sexuality, chastity and morality.

The Story of Stories

THE STORY OF STORIES

I want to tell a story; to grab a pen and sketch a tale in blues, to grab a thought, dole it out into liveable characters and stream their thoughts through my thoughts. I will give it life, plausible existence welling from my imaginations, form a world constructed in words and give life beyond the life I’ve been given. The tale might be beyond or below my existence, but it whelms would be far from the mundanely existences that clouds my bay and I would strive to imagine beyond sight, beyond senses and beyond the natural occurrences of this world, even the mystified ones. Yet my tale must be plausible.

For sensibility, thought is required, as thoughts are streamlined in tunes of senses, emotions and contemplations. But for plausibility, relativity is required, and relativity is self, perception and a merger of senses, knowledge and understanding. Now I wonder if plausibility is beyond imaginations or if imaginations are beyond plausibility, if a man’s believability is relative to his imaginations, or to his knowledge; the scope of his understanding.

6 Things You Should Know About Easter

1. What is Easter?
Easter is the most important Christian festival. Christians
are followers of Jesus Christ who lived about 2000 years
ago in a country called Palestine. They believe that Jesus
was the son of God. At Easter time Christians remember
the last week of Jesus' life.

2. Origin of the name Easter
The name, “Easter” comes from a goddess: Her name was Eostre
and She was the Mother Goddess of the Saxons of Northern Europe.
She was, according to Grimm (yes, one of those Grimms), “goddess
of the growing light of spring.” One interesting theory posits that
Eostre was the embodiment of the bright, growing half of the year
while Holda was the cold, dark winter personified. The dates of
Easter are so close to Walpurgisnacht that they may have been
concurrent at one time, the night giving way to the first day of
Summer. This would make Ostara (the German name for Her
holiday) a time of transition. Early in the history of Christianity,
many pagan observances were adapted for the new faith. The early
missionaries discovered that it was easier to get converts to
celebrate a new name than it was a new date.

3. The White House and Easter
“The White House Easter Egg Roll” event has been celebrated by
the President of the United States and their families since 1878.

Nigeria: The Break Of Dawn

We have come to a point in the history of our beloved country where the level of political consciousness and participation is like never before. Since independence in 1960, this country as we know it has survived fifty-four years of both civilian and military rule. In spite of the numerous challenges and problems that have bedeviled Her, She has emerged stronger and better over the decades.

In 1962-63, the Nation was plunged into  a crisis, following the regional disagreements over the figures which followed the Census exercise of 1962 and a repeat exercise in 1963. This crisis and the irregularities that encumbered the 1964 general elections and 1965 western regional elections all ensued into serious socio-political disorder which culminated in the Nzeogwu coup of January 15, 1966.

From this point onwards, the Nation's political scene grossly degenerated into a state of inter-ethnic suspicion and inter-tribal hatred. By July 30, 1966, a counter-coup had already been executed, ushering in a military Government led by Gowon.

It is, therefore, upon the issues which followed Gowon's ascent that I write this article.

Upon the emergence of Gowon as the Military head of state of Nigeria, some Northerners felt it was time to embark on a pogrom against their Eastern counterparts. The targeted mass slaughtering of Igbos resident in the North eventually culminated in the Nigerian Civil war, a ravaging Holocaust which lasted three years; costing the nation millions in Human capital and setting the economy back by several years. It is imperative, however, to state that all these destructions could have been prevented if the North had adopted the spirit of good sportsmanship, by reining the natural human urge of being overtly excited by victory and power.

Today, some forty-eight years later, history has successfully replayed itself, but in an unarguably better and democratic manner this time. Even more fortunate for us is the fact that this time around, the country is inhabited, not by ethnic and religious bigots, but by a more educated, enlightened and tolerant citizenship.

Despite the fact that we have come a long way in our quest for national integration and unity, it still burdens my heart to find a few extremist and discordant elements amongst us. These are the people who do not understand the concept of democracy and electoral laws. It is imperative to state that in every election, the constitution empowers qualified adult citizens to either run for elective posts, participate as part of the electorate or better still engage in both roles. The choice of candidate is solely done based on the discretion of the individual or group as the case may be. This right to elect a political candidate of your choice should be universally respected and tolerated by others, even if it conflicts with their own choice .

It is now clear that the recent presidential election which had about fourteen contenders has ended with a clear cut winner emerging the most victorious at the polls. However, it is worthy of note to state that there is no victor or vanquished; in the words of the General himself, "it is a collective victory for all Nigerians".

After so many decades of getting it wrong, the ideals and principles of democracy is finally beginning to reflect in our electoral processes.
After fifty-four years of existence, the voices of the common man is beginning to get heard by the political aristocrats. From this point onwards, our leaders would no longer take the opinions of the masses with levity. Through the medium of this election, we have sent a very strong message to the political elite. Power can no longer be grabbed at will using military force, neither can elections be manipulated to suit any single individual or political cabal.

Furthermore, this new development in our political frontier  is, undoubtedly, a prayer answered.  We only aspire for a replication of such improvements in every other area of our nation's multifaceted fronts.

On a conclusive note, I advice every citizen of this great country to embrace this new phenomenon with open arms, keen eyes and critical minds.
Our roles as patriotic citizens of this Nation does not end with filing out under the fiery sun or heavy rain to thumbprint every four years. Our service to this country is a continuum which involves the constant probing, criticism, appreciation and encouragement of our leaders to not only perform, but to also exceed expectations.

The result of this election is a victory for the suffering masses and the civil servants, the unemployed graduates and the generator-powered businesses, the outcome of this poll is a victory for us all and for democracy in Nigeria. Therefore, instead of engaging one another in childish, pedantic and derogatory debates about whose candidate won or lost, our focus should be redirected to the challenges of the near future and the fountain of positive change we all gravely thirst for.
I enjoin us all to buckle our seat belts, so that when the wind of change and transformation blows, none of us would be caught napping.

Onyeoziri Favour
(Writer, poet and blogger
Rouvafe.blogspot.com)

9 THINGS NIGERIANS WANT FROM THEIR NEW PRESIDENT - by Oluwadamilola Adio

Guest post

WHAT NIGERIANS WANT FROM THEIR NEW PRESIDENT

With the 2015 general elections getting closer than ever, this article wants to highlight some important issues the incoming President should address with great commitments and seriousness. It is no longer news that we have two big contenders amongst others jostling for the occupancy of the Aso Rock Villa and the leadership of this huge nation; the incumbent President Goodluck Ebele Jonathan (GCFR) of the People Democratic Party which has been ruling for all the 16 years of Nigeria's young democracy and his biggest opposition is in person of General Muhammadu Buhari a former military head of state and 5 time aspirant contesting under the new opposition party; All Progressive Congress.

After their emergence as the flag bearers if their respective parties for the Presidential race, it is to be noted that the electioneering and campaigning strategies of the two biggest candidates has not been of the highest standard with both parties often coming short of issues to be addressed after being elected, instead their campaigns has been filled with baseless accusations and counter accusations, incessant finger pointing of wrong doing by one the other, varying degrees of lawsuits, numerous controversies and buying of the electorates with money, not forgetting their colourful rallies and advertisement.

How Far would you go to defend your beliefs?

The Bus Ride

The consciousness had never been this high.
People who used to feel detached and unconcerned, now debate in Cafeterias and on bustling streets. Newspaper vendors, never witnessed so much sales and attention, these days, their headlines were flooded with Libels and written slander. Headlines are up for sale to the highest bidder and the mass media are divided along political battle lines.

The circumstances surrounding these forth coming elections are absolutely unpredictable. While some sing of change and the enthronement of a new dispensation, others prefer to water the dying tree of continuity, hoping that another four years would see it finally bearing the much awaited fruits of development and national security. Yet, some others disagree with both aforementioned groups. A third party clamours for a total breakaway from the present and the past. They neither want a four year extension of the present nor a repeat of the past. This third group clamours for the majority of the numerous minority parties, who unfortunately garners the fewer percentage of the electorate.

Somewhere on the corner of a sleeping Lagos street, a grey-hair recounts events of years past. Times when one naira equalled one dollar on the foreign exchange market. His army of young listeners stood attentively,  forming a semi-circle around him, captivated by the educative voice of over eight decades old. The grey hair, sadly recounts years of when his country stood tall and proud among the comity of Nations. He speaks of those years with grave sadness, he remembers them as a mother would, a foetus that was dead at birth.

I board a bus-load of students and youths, all of whom had just left the venue of a town Hall meeting, where smear politics had just been executed by yet another political party. The Bus is filled with silence, but was also as tense as a house filled with petrol, waiting for just a spark to ignite it's ability to explode.

7 Laws of Drinking Alcohol

Every passing day, more youths join the army of adult Alcoholics. The question is no more, how to stop people from consuming alcohol. The only realistic thing to do now, is to manage these alcoholics to ensure they drink responsibly, without causing injuries to either themselves or others in the society.

Here are 7 steps to achieve this.

1. Never drink before or while driving
Everyone knows the reason for this, please even if you feel like committing suicide, just do it quietly in the comfort of your own house. You don't have to take others with you.

2. Know your Limit
You love alcohol, cool. Now, its time for you to gauge yourself and realise your tolerance level and limit.

3. Never Drink beyond your limit
Once you get to your limit, then its time to stop. Unless you wish to pass out for hours, wake up with a gargantuan hangover or walk right in front of a speeding vehicle. If you do not wish for any of the three scenarios above, then stay on your own alcohol lane. Do not play the hero with Alcohol.

How Safe Are Our Mothers?

The word bastard may be used to connote the absence of any known biological father in a Child's life, however i am yet to hear the female version of the word. Suffice to say, there is no word in the English dictionary which denotes the absence of a Mother in a child's life. This goes a long way to emphasis the invaluable role mothers play in the life and survival of Children and by extension the human race. A father is dispensable, but a mother is almost impossible to dispose of.

My take on Unilag Babes and Their Love For Materialism

Of recent, i have had a sizeable number of fresh male undergraduates ask me about my take on building an emotional relationship with a Unilag girl. It seemed they were all scared of the negative presentation of Unilag girls as materialistic gold diggers and extravagant spendthrifts.

I keep telling them that it is definitely not so, i know there are some Ladies who Money controls the steering wheel of their lives. These are the ones who rides in any car, not minding who is driving, the ones who eat at any Cafeteria, without bothering about the source of the Money, i know there are the gluttons who think of Men as fools and Mumu's who are easily deceived and exploited. These category of Babes are the career thieves, they are a no no.

IT’S A MANS WORLD… TRUTH OR CONSPIRACY?

ITS A WOMAN'S WORLD

Contrary to what many might think, I was in the right frame of mind when I came up with this theory.

Anyone who has been reading linda ikeji’s blog would have noticed the recent display of IN LINDAS WORDS “EGGPLANTS” by the guys. Upon reading the comments posted below the pictures, guess what I found. A lot of them were posts by ladies. The rest were mostly by guys claiming to have bigger in one sense or the other. It got me thinking, why?
Why are ladies allowed to post pics of themselves in bathing suits and bikinis and crop tops and sometimes like KIM K, total nude and still receive nice comments? A lot of these comments come from guys.
Why are we so wrapped around their fingers that we usually can’t see beyond the booty and tits they are always waving at us to keep our attention?

I know a lot of people will hit back at this with statements like NOT ALL WOMEN ARE LIKE THAT or ITS GUYS THAT ARE INTERESTED. Well I want to set a little challenge. For all those still dependent on their fathers, have you ever wondered why